Stressful Wedding Things: Programs

High on the list of "things I sort of thought about but haven't really decided on yet" is ceremony programs. I'm trying not to stress over it, but I want to make sure we have a nice program for people to follow along with.

I love the modern simplicity of these:


But I'm thinking something like this might be more at my skill level. Pretty cardstock + pretty font = voila!

[all images from The Knot]

Flowers. Sigh.

You know how I feel about flowers. I just can't get excited about them. And even though I'm already settled on my flowers (Gerber daisies from Costco, thank you very much!), I don't know, I'm really loving this modern green bouquet:

[found on The Knot]

Stressful Wedding Things: Favors

ARRRRR. Seriously? I have to do this? Fine. It's gotta be candy. I've been to my fair share of weddings and I don't even remember what the favors were. But the one that sticks out in my mind is my friend's wedding where each guest got an individually wrapped Smith's heart cookie - both yummy and thematically appropriate.

I want my favors to be both edible and local, so I can support local business and give people a taste (literally) of Bakersfield. Right now I'm thinking a handful of Dewar's chews, wrapped with a ribbon. Something along the lines of the picture on the right:

[I'm being a bad blogger right now because I saved this image a long time ago and can't figure out where I got it from. If this is from your blog and/or wedding, hats off to you for coming up with a great favor idea!]

Centerpieces, take two

From my mock-up a few weeks ago, to this... pretty good, huh? Again, this isn't exactly how the looks, just the basic components that we'll be using. I'm even more excited now that my table cards are done - I think they'll add a nice touch to the whole thing.

DIY: Guest Book

I always knew I wanted have a unique guest book. At first, I was thinking something like this:

[find it here]

I made FH a book on Blurb for Christmas. It was easy, fun, and he loved it. And I really adore the idea of having a guest book that becomes a bit more of a keepsake than the average sign-your-name-here-on-the-line type of book.

But then I had my bridal shower, and my brother's girlfriend got me the best present of all - she took something off my to do list! We now have a gorgeous silver picture frame with a nice, big, white mat, perfect for signatures, a la:

[find it here]

Stressful Wedding Things: Music, or rather, Dancing

FH doesn't like to dance. This is well documented. At one wedding we went to, he danced with me once and then spent the rest of the night talking to some other guest about, you guessed it, planes.

I don't like the idea of having a DJ or even a band. Our venue is small(ish) and in a neighborhood, so we can't exactly get our groove on until 2 in the morning. Besides, this isn't really a dancing crowd, with a few exceptions.

My initial thought was that we could have a "first dance" and then just let people do what they want. We'll have music playing via Ipod and if they want to dance, great; if not, no big deal. But now that we are way over on RSVPs I don't think we'll be able to carve out a dedicated space for dancing.

I keep on hoping it won't be an issue, but I can't get Tina Fey (as Liz Lemon) out of my head ... "no dancing at a wedding? That's a dealbreaker!"

Stressful Wedding Things: The Photographer

From the very beginning, I knew photography would be something that was super important for me, despite our budget. When I mentioned to FH that it was a top priority, he said - and I quote - "we don't need a photographer, we can just have people take pictures for us!"

Men.

Um, NO. I'm not Bridezilla about too many things, but photography was one thing I just couldn't compromise or cut corners on. Those pictures are the one thing that we are going to have for the rest of our lives. The flowers are going to die, the food will be consumed, but the pictures are forever. Plus, I really want a gorgeous wedding picture to hang in our house.

I started searching and sent off emails to a bunch of photographers I liked. I tried staying local to our venue location, but just like everything else in Bakersfield, there didn't seem to be much beyond the typical fare. I got back quotes from LA photographers that were way out of my price range.

I started to despair. And then... the blogosphere saved me once again.

To be continued...

Over and out.

After lots of thinking, I've decided to stop the blog for now. My wedding is no longer "my" wedding or "our" wedding. It seems disingenuous to write about my planning and vision day in and day out when, in reality, I have very little control over it. I hope everyone else who is planning their special day gets the day that they truly want - I think that is the most that anyone can ask for, in this crazy world of wedding planning.

Hopefully, once we move and get settled in AZ, I'll have lots to write about with redecorating a house and getting used to life as a stepmom. So, more posts to come, just not right now.

I hate flowers...

But aren't these pretty? They are from my little sister's prom...her date's Mom made this bouquet and I think it's pretty fabulous looking. Surely I can whip something like this up for the wedding.

Right?

Healthy = happy

I feel better when I take excellent care of myself. Simplistic, but it's always harder than it sounds, right? In the next six weeks (eek) leading up the wedding, I am trying to be really conscious of the following:

1. Drinking lots of water (a no-brainer but also harder than it sounds. I keep a 32 oz water bottle on my desk at work and try to drink two full bottles each day.)

2. Drinking green tea. Yogi is my favorite brand ever - you can get it at Trader Joe's and a lot of regular grocery stores, too.

3. Taking my vitamins (I have a whole regime - fish oil capsules, calcium + vitamin D pills, antioxidants, multi-vitamin) - and I keep them in an egg carton to remind me to take them.)

4. Working out, mindfully (watching my form when I lift, not getting lazy or sloppy or working out just to get it over with.)

5. Lots of sleep - I like to get at least 9 hours a night (!)


There are also a few other things that I've added to my routine that are more about vanity than health, but still:

1. Twice weekly glycolic peels. My skin is usually pretty decent but I want it to be amazing for the wedding. And I'm really seeing a difference after only a month of doing the peels. I'm using L'Oreal Acne Intensive Peel, which I found at Big Lots for $4!

2. Teeth whitening strips. I usually do these for big occasions, and I guess my own wedding counts. I'll be ordering a box for myself and FH, who I'm hoping will wear them, despite the fact that the protests have already begun.

Hot hot hot

I don't know whose bright idea it was to get married in Bakersfield in the middle of summer. Oh wait, that was me. But I'm already prepared that it is going to be HOT. Historically, June is much more mild than July or August, but still.

I got a little OCD (it's what I do best!) and looked up the historical weather for our wedding date on Weather Underground, FH's go-to source for weather information (and he's a pilot, so you know you can count on this site being accurate).

The average max temperature for our day is 93 (I can handle that) with the historical high being 113, in 1920 (ugh).

All that to say, tremendous heat + my fear/general hatred of flowers = parasols for my bridesmaids?

[from here]

[from here]

What do you think? I like it because it's cute, different, and practical, all in one. I ran the idea past my Mom and sister/MOH this weekend and got weird looks. So now I'm paranoid that the only wedding ideas I come up with are totally stupid ones. But if Darcy Miller says its okay for an outdoor wedding, it must be okay, right??

To DIY or not to DIY?

One of the downsides (really, the only downside) to being an avid wedding blog reader is that there are so many great potential DIY projects out there, it can get a little overwhelming. I mean, how am I supposed to narrow it down? What is realistic and what isn't for someone with my, um, limited crafting skills? I have to confess that I had never even heard of Gocco until a few months ago.

In my head, I want to be this person. Or this person. I see all of these beautiful ideas and I get excited and somehow, I think I can transform myself into the person who hand-fashions 1,000 paper cranes for my wedding day. (Does folding 120+ paper airplanes count?)

Don't get me wrong - I am in total awe of what these women do to make a meaningful wedding day for themselves. I just think it's better to realize my shortcomings now and plan accordingly.

Umm, do I have to have wedding colors?

Wedding colors. Put those two words together and I'm automatically having visions of matchy matchy matchy and cookie cutter and ugh and NO.

I've noticed that literally, every time people start to ask me about the wedding, one of the first things they ask is "what are your colors?" Like I should have some swatchboard on hand to whip out and show them.

But I just couldn't commit - I love too many things. I had starred so many inspirations boards from Snippet & Ink that my Google Reader was on overload. I had to narrow it down.

I was never the pink girly-girl type, so I don't know why I leaned towards pink bridesmaid dresses. But I love them and there you are. Pink is a good color for almost everyone. It's nice and summery and would look great for a garden wedding. How about pink and orange, my Mom asked. Sure! I just want lots of colors. Happy, summery colors.

Pink dresses and blue shoes? I think it'll work, actually. Or am I crazy? I'm thinking something along the lines of this beautiful board, again courtesy of the always wonderful Snippet & Ink:

The invite's in the mail. No, really.

Whew! The invites are officially in the mail and on their way as of yesterday.

A special shoutout to my little brother for the incredible design and his magic work with getting the printer to work when no one else could (it might have something to do with the dinosaur noises, but who knows?) and to his girlfriend, for staying up until one in the morning with me, sorting, stuffing and stamping away.

Here is our little assembly line:


And the stamps on the RSVP envelope turned out great:

I always see "invite cost breakdowns" on other wedding sites, so I just thought I would recap the total cost per invite ...

Invites - 40 per box at $25/box =
$0.62 per invite (outer envelope, invite, invite sleeve, RSVP card and RSVP envelope)

+

Printing - free, although after a lot of stress and dinosaur noises (don't ask)

+

Postage - $0.42 for the outer envelope + $0.44 for the RSVP envelope =
$0.86 (that means that my postage expense was more the the actual invitations themselves...)

=

Total per invite: $1.48
(!!!!!!!!!)

A new last name

I love my current signature. I don't write in cursive at all, except for my signature. I worked for years to perfect it. It's swooshy and kind of awesome looking, if I do say so myself.



See? I love making those L's.

Problem: I am an L no longer. My new almost-last name begins with S. I am bad at making cursive S's. Like, super bad.


Look at that pathetic cursive S in the lower right hand corner. Sad, I tell you. I like to blame my lack of cursive skills on skipping second grade, since that is the time that everyone else I know learned cursive. But I'm probably just lazy.

So I practiced:


I know, am I fifth grade or something? I made FH sign too, to see how he does his S's. I even practiced signing my new signature at stores over the weekend (no one seemed to notice or care that I was signing a different last name that what was on the credit card) and it just doesn't feel natural yet. But if you think about it, I've been writing the same combination of first and last names for roughly 25 years. That's one heck of a habit to break.

Problem Solved: Cake

My wonderful fabulous cousin (who I am still in awe of, as when I was young, because she can french-braid her own hair - how awesome is that??) bakes wedding cakes as a side business. When I first got engaged, I asked her if she would make our cake for us, if she was able to make the trip out. I just found out that she will be able to come out for the wedding and I couldn't be more excited.

It's also perfect, since one of my goals was to incorporate people we knew and love and the fantastic skills they possess into our wedding day. FH's gregarious older brother is going to be our officiant, his talented niece is going to play our ceremony music, and my insanely creative little brother is designing our wedding invitations.

But back to cake. We still have to talk it over but I'm thinking yumminess is way more important that a big fancy cake. I like the simplicity of this:

[from The Knot via The Pissed Off Bride]

Problem Solved: The Dress

Finally, after much laying around on the couch and flipping through wedding magazines and obsessing over THE dress, I looked it up on CSIS's website. I never would have picked it out in a million years based on the picture and styling they used online. But I'm glad I looked it up, because it was fifty dollars cheaper than the store price, which had already been marked down. Sign me up for that!

To recap, not only did I buy my dress from a fairly ridiculous place that represents the wedding industry that I have come to loathe, I bought it from their website. And I love it. I can't wait to turn the corner and have FH see me for the very first time.

I don't dare post a picture, or even a picture of something similar, since FH reads this blog. But here's what it doesn't look like:

Stressful Wedding Things: The Dress

Going into this, I had some pretty definitive opinions about what I wanted in a dress and I figured it would be hard to find the type of dress I wanted while also staying within my budget.

I took some great advice from a good friend, who told me to pay a visit to "[Chain Store I Scorn - CSIS from now on] and just try different things on, to get an idea of what looks good on you and what you like". Okay, cool, great advice.

I walked into CSIS on a Saturday morning and they promptly assigned me to an associate who showed me to my dressing room, complete with gold framed mirrors and frayed teal carpet. She started bringing me things to try on and you know what? It was kind of ... fun. My Mom and sister were with me and I felt so pretty and special - it was kind of nice to have someone basically wait on me. And don't even get me started on how fun it was to stand on the pedestal thing and stare at myself all dressed up.

The dresses were all pretty, but I didn't come to CSIS to buy, I came to try on. Then, she brought THE dress out. I actually didn't know it was THE dress until I tried it on. But once I did, I didn't want to take it off. I twirled on the pedestal, my sister took a million pictures of me, I looked at myself from every conceivable angle. It was THE dress.

I didn't want to buy it right then and there, despite the grave warnings from the store associate that "it could be gone tomorrow". I went home and thought about it, and thought about it some more until I was basically obsessing.

[to be continued]

DIY: E-Save the Date

Venue? Check. Date? Check. Save the dates? Um, no.

I thought I didn't have time - or money - to do save the dates. After all, our engagement was only going to be about four months long and everything I'd read recommended sending out save the dates 9 to 12 months in advance.

Then I stumbled across this gem of a post on Weddingbee. I did some more research and apparently, electronic save the dates are not only easy and free, but acceptable by etiquette standards, too. I decided I didn't care if it was only four months out, I still wanted to ask our guests to set aside that particular day for us.

I took a favorite picture of FH and myself and doctored it up in InDesign to include our date information and also to request that they respond to the email with their mailing addresses. (Which, while a great idea, most of them didn't bother. But that is another post!)

I exported the file as a JPEG and used Microsoft Outlook to link the image with our wedding website and then sent it to my Gmail account, so I could send it out to everyone on our invitation list from there. I had a few bouncebacks and only about half of the group responded. But all of the responses that did come back were really positive and encouraging (both about the Save the Date and our upcoming marriage in general).

All in all, I thought it worked really well and we were both happy with how it turned out. I was a bit rushed at the end, so the image didn't link correctly to our website. I wish I would have tested it a few more times to make sure it was working correctly. I will probably end up doing a small insert in the invite with the URL to our website, so people know it exists and can check it out on their own time. Ah, technology...

Stressful Wedding Things: Bridesmaid Dresses

This may surprise you, what with my history of strong opinions, but I really didn't care about my bridesmaid's dresses. I've read all kinds of articles and blog posts on brides who dictate every aspect of the maid's appearances, all the way down to jewelry and well, I love my girls, but I just can't bring myself to be that crazy.

My maids are all different ages (31, 18, and 8) and accordingly, all different body types. The only thing I really cared about was that they were comfortable, felt pretty and, most importantly, didn't spend a lot of money on something they would never wear again.

Enter, J Crew.

I've loved their dresses, wedding-specific or not, for a long time. They have a lot of great dresses in fantastic colors. I don't have wedding colors per se, at least, I didn't when I was looking at the dress selection, but for some reason I was drawn to pinks and oranges. Eventually, I decided on pink ("tea rose") and the girls then picked the style they liked best.

My Maid of Honor, also known as my big little sister, will be wearing this:



My Matron of Honor, also known as the ultimate sister-friend, will be wearing this (this is tea rose as well, but for some reason looks lighter than the dress above):



And FH's daughter, whom I love and adore, will be wearing this, which is beyond adorable and I am very annoyed I could not find a proper JPEG of it to upload.

All of the dresses are the tea rose shade and cotton blends. I think the color and style of the dresses will work well for the casually elegant backyard vibe I am going for and each girl can style and accessorize their dress any way they want. I can't wait to see them all lined up together!